If comics get reviewed in a forest and no one is around to hear - Matt on 6/10

Hey, remember those other guys who used to post here sometimes? They seemed nice. I wonder what ever happened to them. Also, the two people who used to comment. Ah well. Comics!

۞ Okay, I've mentioned how much I'm enjoying Batman R.I.P., right? Like, in a non-ironic, non-negative way? Because I really, really am. So why is nothing even resembling that storyline showing up in this ostensible crossover with Detective #846? I'll admit that I think Hush is a monumentally stupid character, so I'm prejudiced against this from the jump, but this is ... Look, in a vacuum this would be okay. Ish. I guess. But trying to tell me that this has ANYthing to do with the clever, complicated stuff Morrison's doing over in the main book is setting the bar a bit high. Forgettable, and I'm not going to be sticking with this storyline.

۞ Batman Confidential #19 is part three of the storyline, and more of the same: a solidly entertaining flashback story from Fabian Nicieza with exquisite artwork from Kevin Maguire. They've worked together as a creative team before, and they mesh well. Fun stuff.

۞ I know, I know: I swore I was done with Booster Gold. And I hate buying things just because they're part of a crossover -- it makes me feel like a sucker. But I LOVED DC One Million back in the day, so sending this book retroactively into the crossover was reason enough for me to buy it.

The level of disappointment I feel is suitable punishment for letting myself be tricked like this. Hey, DC: it's ISSUE #1,000,000, not the YEAR 1,000,000. It's the year 85,271, as you correctly note on the cover. And if you were going to go to the trouble of matching the cover, why not include the stupid CGI title page that was on all the 1,000,000 issues as well? Seriously half-assed as a One Million tribute, and still meh as a comic on its own. Fool me once, etc.

۞ Secret Invasion #4 is better than Secret Invasion #3. Damning with faint praise? Maybe so, but it's what I've got.

۞ Invincible Iron Man #3 is fantastic. Matt Fraction's script seems carefully designed to be equally applicable to modern Marvel Universe continuity or to Iron Man movie continuity, and it's such a good Iron Man story that I found myself not caring either way. The strongest Iron Man's book has been since ... I dunno, since I was, like, 12. Nice showcase for Larocca's art, too. Much more appropriate than newuniversal.

۞ Okay, okay, a little bit more on Secret Invasion: it feels to me like Bendis is just hitting plot beats, like he just re-read Robert McKee's STORY and is following all the rules on this one. This is the middle issue, so we find out more about the Invasion plans, the heroes begin to regroup, sort of, and ... yeah, it just all completely fails to come alive for me. Oh well. Maybe next issue.

۞ Although I do have to wonder why the whole thing feels so much better in the tie-in books -- Captain Britain and MI-13 #3 is what I want from the MAIN miniseries: a plot with enough energy and momentum to carry itself past its own stupid points; characters who seem different from one another, and invested in the moment; some humor, some wit, some flair; heroic moments that feel genuinely heroic ... this is worth checking out even if you're ignoring SI altogether.

۞ Action Comics #867 does a nice job continuing the Braniac story. It's shaping up to be another nice Geoff Johns-written DCU book and the best Superman's been in a while. But... well, how to put this.... Ah, heck with it, I'll scan in the image, but let's do it in bits and pieces first. This is from the book's splash page. Can you guess what Supergirl is doing?


If you guessed "vomiting," "recovering from a brutal hangover," "smelling something awful," or "appearing in a Warren Ellis comic," you think along the same lines as me. You're also wrong; she's examining a Braniac drone and is meant to be looking frightened.

Here's another bit of the image that irritated me.


Yes, the left side is a bit deceptive as the shadow cast by her arm makes her appear even more unhealthily skinny, but even with out that ... why is Supergirl emaciated? Look at her ribs jutting out -- it makes me want to send her fifty cents a day so she can get away from Sally Struthers.

So let's put together those two images with the rest of it and see what we get...


Yep. It's Paris Hilton: Supergirl. I can't wait for my daughter to be old enough to enjoy this with me.

GET IT TOGETHER, GARY FRANK!

Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow - Matt gets caught up

Hey, so having a kid is time-consuming! Who saw THAT coming? Not me, obviously. Fortunately, she's a dreadful conversationalist, so I can safely read comics while rocking her and the like. Here are my reviews on last Wednesday's books, followed by a couple of "preview" reviews for books that'll be out tomorrow.

۞ Secret lnvasion #3 is, perhaps predictably, a huge disappointment to me. Issue #1 of this was exciting! It was punchy! Stuff happened and things blew up and there was a big surprise ending and wooooooooo! Since then, it's been a long, wanky fight scene (issue #2), and now this: the Marvel F-list fights bravely in New York! They all talk Bendis-y! Something bad happens to The Vision version 8.3, and I try manfully to remember who he is and where he came from and if I should care! There's one good paranoia scene that's got to be a fakeout (or DOES it?!?!), and then a cliffhanger where a bunch of heroes charge in to save the world and it would be amazingly cool, except that it's, like, the G-list of unrecognizable Marvel dudes.

Actually, it's not even the G-list -- it's a bunch of Bendis's pet characters who we know are awesome because he spent a whole issue of Avengers telling us that Nick Fury (who all the famous characters think is awesome) thinks these no-marks are awesome. THAT, my friends, is character development at its finest.

And Lenil Yu is clearly being rushed, as the cleaner line he was using in issue #1 is back to being the Sienkiewicz-ian scrawl he's perfected since Superman: Birthright. This is starting to feel an awful lot like Bendis's last Might Marvel Miniseries, House of Filler.

۞ A while back, Commenter Sean mentioned that he's been known to develop crushes on writers, and I know exactly where he's coming from. I was totally into Matt Fraction for awhile (Five Fists of Science, Casanova, that Spider-Man annual, Iron Fist), but then we got together and it was totally not all I was hoping it would be (Punisher War Journal). So I avoided him for awhile and he acted all embarrassed around me and it was totally awkward until we got drunk together at this party and made out, and there were no strings attached and that was pretty good except for that one part when Namor showed up (The Order). So now things are kind of okay again and I think I like him but I don't know how he feels about me and I'm afraid to ask because what if it makes things all weird, you know?

Which is a long way to go to say that Invincible Iron Man #2 is just as good as issue #1 was, and that you should be buying it and loving it and treasuring every moment with it, because it's summer and you can never tell what's going to happen to a guy on his summer vacation.

۞ I don't really want to make out with Justice Society of America #16, but I sure am pleased to bump into it. This is apparently the story that Geoff Johns has been setting up with the nigh-incomprehensible last four issues, because this is a sharp little character piece masquerading as a 1980's DC Comic (in the best possible way). Some nice swerves on the typical Galactus story, and a good use of the ridiculously large cast. Maybe I'll reread from issue #9 or whatever and see how it hangs together.

۞ I'm the dissenting voice on Kick-Ass #3, it appears. As I mentioned in my thoughts on Marvel 1985 a week or two back, I find Mark Millar surprisingly good at writing teen drama, so I liked the in-school bits, but the super-hero stuff remains dull to me, no matter how much violence he injects it with. I think this will read better in collection, to be honest.

۞ Trinity #1 is ... okay. It features the Superman-Batman-and-Wonder-Woman-sit-around-a-table scene that is apparently required in all 21st Century DC Comics, but THIS TIME THEY'RE IN THEIR CIVILIAN IDENTIES!!!!! ZOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!! That said, at least Kurt Busiek doesn't feel compelled to cover the page with 75 billion different colored captions (like Brad Meltzer), or to weight the proceedings down with trite pseudo-psychological melodrama (like, oh, say, Brad Meltzer). It's not the Busiek of Astro City, nor even the terrific early Thunderbolts issues, but it's a solid superhero comic and a promising start to a weekly series. (Except for the backup, which I found literally unreadable. That might be a problem down the line.)

۞ Ultimate Origins #1 was always going to be a problem for me. I found Bendis's thin reinventions of the Marvel Universe in Ultimate Team-Up and Ultimate Spider-Man to be much less interesting than Millar's ground-up rethinks in Ult. X-Men and Ultimates. (Ult. Spider-Man overcomes this with some excellent craft and lively character drama, but Team-Up was pretty much an unmitigated disaster.)

So Ultimate Origins, being Bendis's unifying theory of the Ultimate Universe, was bound to accent the side of the Ultimate line that I find less interesting, and as such to disappoint me.

Which it does. (And I thought this was Butch Guice's worst art in a while as well.) At least it met expectations.....

۞ I also read The Boys #19, which was just as good as the rest of the issues have been, and as such not worthy of special praise or scorn. The price you pay for consistent work, I suppose.

۞ Which brings us to this week's preview books. It was a pretty thin bunch, a lot of things that I don't find interesting to begin with (Moon Knight) or didn't find particularly interesting once I had read them (Hulk: Raging Thunder, the apocalyptically grim X-Force: Ain't No Dog). But I do want to call special attention to Skaar, Son of Hulk #1, which overcomes a catastrophically stupid title to be a surprisingly good book.

For everyone who was disappointed that World War Hulk failed to be an adequate follow-up to the themes and ideas of Planet Hulk ... this is your book. Something like a really good Conan comic blended together with Marvel's sci-fi stuff, there's a lot of promise here, and it's worth checking out.

(Also, it contains 100% less Jeph Loeb than Marvel's other Hulk book, which guarantees a quality uptick.)

Yeah...About That

Well, this week I'm apparently wearing my angry hat because of one particular book. That book is Ultimate Origins. I have no problem with the Guice. Hell, I have no problem with them trying to go back to the ultimate mission statement of it being a unique universe that has the same characters. What I do have a problem with is, the reveal on the those last couple of pages. That and the fact that they have apparently ignored just about everything Mark Millar did in the burgeoning days of the Ultimate U by giving a certain , pivotal, character powers that have never been mentioned, hinted at or considered even in the books Bendis himself wrote. Oh, and that isn't even the reveal that I am talking about which is frankly silly be comic book standards, but I'll still finish the series. So go check it out to know what will be breaking the internet by the weekend. And now onto the rest of the books.

Secret Invasion # 3 - Like my opinion matters on this one. For what it's worth it's an improvement on the last issue, but still not as good as the first issue. And yes, they tease the unthinkable again. Actually, my only real problem with it is that it seems from time to time that they tease reveals of certain characters (you know who) that seems like it would drop a huge deuce on a lot of quality work that other creators have been doing in the past couple of years. As it's own book though, it's a decent read. And Yu is doing some of the finest work of his career. So, annoying teases aside it's an improvement over last issue. I know I can't wait until issue #5 for the startling return of Mantis. That's a joke...I hope.

Kick Ass # 3 - It's Millar at his Millariest and at some points it teeters on being Ennisish sensibilities. And I couldn't be more thrilled. Still a fun read and it only looks to be getting better. I think that sums it all up really.

Invincible Iron Man #2 - Damn fine. Fraction is keeping up the good work on this one. It's charming, it's got action and yup...Just go buy it.

Cable #4 - Kind of meh. As time wears on I tend to get bothered by some of the things Olivetti does from time to time. I mean I dig the way he renders characters, but some of the effects, the cars and action look a little off from time to time. I mean this is the man who left the Quake 2 targeting reticule in a background in War Journal. Anyway, as for the other content this book is kind of dragging. It's just another example of the modern trend of stretching out what would have been a two issue arc fifteen years ago into at least 4-6 issues for the sake of trade publishing. It's not really that bad it's just drawn out. Makes me afraid for Iron Fist.

Avengers/Invaders # 2 - I have absolutely no idea how this book is going to run for 12 issues. I mean it's been alright so far, but I really think they could wrap this up in a couple more issues. Unless, inevitably, the Avengers get sent through the time bubble and Luke Cage punches out Hitler or Wolverine and 40's Wolverine team up or something. Actually, the most potentially interesting element involves one of the grunts that ended up in the future with the Invaders. And the potential for 2 Submariners showing up next issue. Oh, points off for the bomb arm thing. That just seems bizarre. And if anyone can find evidence of that being an actual tactic well, I'll just be even more disturbed. Pretty much, this book is right in the middle of the pack.

The Boys # 19 - This book had returned to form in the previous arc, and this arc looks to continue the trend. The big thing that changed it was a return to telling stories about characters and attempting to develop them. So, yup, I'd give it the slight thumbs up.

Trinity # 1 - It can't possibly be worse than Countdown... It's not. I seriously have no idea where this is going though, but I'm a sucker for the weekly because, well, it's weekly. I'm going to wait a couple of issues until I pass judgment because this is pure exposition. But at least it'll have consistent art as opposed to Countdown. Also I never knew that I would actually miss 52 as much as I did during the Countdown period.

Well, that's it for me for now. Still haven't read War Journal and I haven't finished Detective yet. If anything that should be a review in and of itself. So there you go. That's about it. I read most of Young X-men and it's, well, Young X-men. With one of the silliest cameos of the year. Why can't we just bring back New X-Men already? And this arc on Spidey was alright which makes me think the next one will probably be awful. Seems to be the way that book goes.